I have to get the stuff rattling around in my head to go somewhere and this is as good a place as any so I'm putting my thoughts down for anyone who cares. Maybe someone will benefit or recognize they're not alone.

I read a thing years ago about how Holocaust survivors had passed the trauma they experienced down through their DNA. Then someone told me about this book which, surprise, I have time to read now. We’re going to be dealing with this as humanity for a while. Get comfy.

Monday was two weeks since the tornado blew through. It feels like six months ago. The flood was a decade ago this year. What Nashville knows about ourselves is we are resilient. It’s no accident that we come together as a community to take care of one another. Our secret sauce is our creative community. Everybody in tech knows everybody, same for the graphic designers and the musicians. And these communities overlap. At the heart of it, we’re still a big small town, despite our unprecedented growth of the last few years. The neighborhoods follow suit - know someone in one neighborhood, you’ll eventually know everybody. And the connections spread, like a good virus. I rambled there, but my point is if anyone can figure this craziness out, it’s the creatives: we are used to thinking outside the box. There has never been a better time to think outside the box. The old rules are broken, let’s make new ones. And to all the musicians playing their hearts out on various platforms, I raise a glass to you from isolation.

This week, my therapy has been to pick up the phone and call people - close friends and people who are merely acquaintances. These have been about half hour conversations. But it’s very important to touch base right now. We need human connection, even the most introverted of us. Call somebody -- it’s a really good time to catch up. Every call has ended with a sincere “I really appreciate you reaching out.”

A friend created a really wonderful group on Facebook and we’re sharing what we’re cooking. I’ve found so much comfort in talking about food and nourishment. People from all walks of life, all over the country, actually the globe. At the heart of things, we all want to be nourished and comforted.

The weird thing I”m experiencing is as a person who is wound up and has a default setting of “what’s the worst case scenario” for most things, I’ve been oddly calm. Maybe it’s a matter of because there are so many tentacles for anxiety triggers, mine have gone quiet. I’d welcome some sort of psychological counsel or input on that.

Another oddity, I’ll get involved in some mundane task and then I’ll snap back to the reality of what’s going on in the world. And sadness envelops me. “This is really happening.”

I often laugh about my “unhealthy relationship with work.” I will work through anything. Sadly I have two speeds, WORK and STOP. If I quit, I might lay down on the sofa & not get up. Also, my output is tied to my self-worth -- told you, it’s an unhealthy relationship. I still have projects to finish so I’m keeping my head down when I find focus and chip away at them. That’s a normalcy I pray continues, but I also know I’m not immune. I’ve also quietly reached out to people whose businesses are hurting and offering support of sharing my expertise.

What I've consumed

potato soup

spanish rice with shrimp

bolognese sauce and pasta

Doritos

3 bags of Lays Dill Pickle chips

a case of Cokes

a bottle of wine

a New Heights "Nothing Fancy."

Media:

The Pharmacist (Netflix)

Generation Wealth (Amazon Prime Video)

The Outsider (HBO Now)

A friend shared this meme with me earlier in the week: I'm not sure I've ever felt so seen in my life. Isolation during the week is not much of a transition for me. However, a new game I'm playing is "what is that noise coming from next door."

Neighbors Sheryl and Al gave me a sweet new Manuel shirt for my birthday